Fan Fic: Valley of the Sun

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Well here it is. Over the last few weeks I've been writing my own James Bond story. I am not a great writer, but I think I have a very good plot. Tell me what you think of it. Here are the 1st two chapters (Because they kind of go together), and I'll post another chapter every week or so, maybe more often. So here it goes, my novel. Tell me if you like it.

Valley of the Sun

A James Bond Novel
By Zach Most

Chapter 1
You Can Be Assured That It’s Nothing Good

It was pitch black. No sound could be heard. A shadow zoomed across the room and it can not be identified. Footsteps could be heard at a corner in the room and behind one of the many steel plated boxes in the room is James Bond, 007.
He waited in this corner until he heard another zooming noise of a mysterious figure shooting across the area. Bond scurried to another box on the adjacent corner from where he was before. Another shadowy-figure hurried across the room and this time Bond fixed his eye on it and he pointed his Walter PPK in the air. He fired two shots, rolled out behind a box towards the middle of the room, pointed his gun in the opposite direction, and fired two more. Quickly he ran across the room to the corner he originated in and waited for a few seconds behind the first steel plated box. He dove out and in mid-air, fired three shots, and landed behind another box, this one heavily rusted, and he stood up.
Lights were flipped on and the room became very luminous. ‘Universal Exports’ can be read on all of the boxes (except the ones that are too heavily rusted to be read). There is a target shaped like a body behind Bond’s body with two bullet holes almost entirely overlapping each other directly on the small white circle on the target’s chest representing his heart. Bond walked across the room and removed one of the targets from the wall. There are two bullet holes precisely on the head of the victim, but there is one off to the side which is a miss. Bond seemed very displeased with himself, but before he can make another reaction, he heard a voice. It is the voice of M, coming from a PA system, who demanded, “007, report to my office immediately,” and Bond casually walked towards a steel door, touched a button to the right side of the door, and the door opened and Bond walked out.

“You called,” said Bond. A female M stands in the room, and she has a look on her face like something very serious is happening. She is holding a remote and replies,
“We have no time to waste,” as she pressed a red button about halfway down the remote on the right side. A screen appeared on the back wall and it has a photograph of a man. The man is Latino, he has dark brown colored hair, and a mole beneath his lip on the right side of his face. He seems to be in his 40’s. M utters, “Victor Garcia, I believe you know him 007, a Mexican smuggler, we have uncovered that he has smuggled illegal goods into Mexico, America, Central America, and northern South American countries, such as Venezuela, Colombia, and Brazil. His legitimate front is an exporting company based in Tijuana. We have never taken action to stop him, we believe that that job belongs to the Americans, but they deny any evidence that we supply them of Garcia’s wrongdoings.”
“Because he supplies the American government with secret information of what’s happening inside the governments of Mexico and other Latin American countries.” Interrupted Bond.
“Correct 007, although I’d prefer it if you’d let me give briefing.”
“So what’s the problem?” replied an impatient Bond. M pressed another button on the remote and a picture of an armed forces official is shown. Bond did not recognize this man, but it can be determined that he is Russian because of the pin on his uniform which shows the flag of Russia, which is accompanied with the flag of the former Soviet Union.
“General Mikhail Kirchev,” replied M, “A Russian general who has been a high ranking official in the Russian army dating back to the Soviet Union. Garcia sent a private plane to pick up Kirchev from Moscow. They are having a secret meeting in the Swiss Alps. We don’t know what this is about, but you can be assured that it’s nothing good. You are to go to that meeting and find out what they are talking about, and after Kirchev leaves take Garcia into custody, but make sure Kirchev has left, we don’t want to cause an international incident with the Russians.”
“When do I leave?” asked Bond.
“Now”.

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Chapter 2

A Meeting in the Mountains

Bond was now in an all black uniform that is well suited for a cold mountain. He is wearing a heavy jacket and ski pants and has his gun in a holster underneath his jacket. There is a miniature microphone at the end of a long wire that has an earpiece on it in his pocket. He walked to a back door of an old logged ski lodge that said, “Autorisé Personnel Seulement,” which Bond translated into “Authorized Personal Only.” He was inside a meat storage room that was not refrigerated, just poorly insulated so it would stay cold. He quietly walked by two chefs who were having an argument in Italian, Bond could translate some of what they said as, “What’s with all the security today?” “Maybe a rich American woman complained about seeing a spider.” This was followed by laughter. On the other side of the room Bond opened a door and he was now in an empty kitchen that opened into the main room but there was a counter separating the kitchen and the room.
Immediately, Bond saw Victor Garcia standing in the middle of the room. He was wearing a dark green skiing outfit and had skis on his feet. Bond ducked behind the counter and he placed the microphone on top of it and listened intently as General Kirchev entered the room.
“Glad you can make it,” recited Garcia in his Mexican accent.
“Let’s get to business,” replied Kirchev, “I want to know why I’m here.”
“I’m moving the operation forward to next Tuesday” stated Garcia.
“Why so soon?” said Kirchev.
“Our window of opportunity has shrunk; the timetable had to be moved forward.”
“Alright, I’ll make sure to be in Tijuana when it’s done.”
“I trust you will”
Bond looked around the room, and he saw Garcia and Kirchev standing in the middle surrounded by guards. Each man had three guards, but knowing both of them, Bond realized that they both had at least half a dozen more guards outside of the room. Garcia’s guards were also wearing ski equipment and had skis on.
One of Kirchev’s guards came up to him and whispered something to him that Bond could not hear.
“I must leave now. I’ll see you at your factories in Tijuana.”
With this Kirchev left the room, standing behind one of his guards and in front of the other three. After the door closed, Bond put the microphone with the earpiece in his pocket and was trying to think of a way he could get a gun pointed at Garcia’s head. At that moment one of the chefs came in the same door Bond did and screamed, “Who are you?” as he saw Bond and ran back into the meat room. Garcia muttered to himself, “Intruder” and pressed a button on his watch. Bond did not see the button being pressed but stood up planning on getting Garcia at gunpoint. But then one of Garcia’s guards came from the meat room and came behind him. He shouted in a Latino accent, “Drop your weapon and put your hands in the air.”
Garcia heard this from the other side of the room and demanded, “Move out everyone, you, kill him,” while pointing at Bond. Bond saw Garcia and his men leave through a door that led directly outside and they started to ski down the mountain. Bond could tell that the man behind him wasn’t a skilled gunman and Bond quickly elbowed him in the face. He tuned around, grabbed his arm, and hit the man’s arm hard enough that he dropped the gun. Bond punched him twice and threw against the wall and he fell down.
Bond realized that he had to go after Garcia. He found a pair of skis on the wall next to two ski poles; he slipped them on and took the poles and made his way through the door. Bond couldn’t hold his gun and hold the ski poles at the same time so he left his gun in its holster. Bond raced down the mountain at an incredible speed to catch up with Garcia and his men. He could faintly see his enemies as he sped up. Finally, Garcia saw Bond catching up and told his men to fire. One of his men slowed down to a halt, turned around, and started firing at Bond with an assault riffle, probably an AK-47 Bond thought. Bond was skiing as fast as he possibly could to avoid the gunshots, until the shooter ran out of ammo. He caught up to the guard and stuck one of his poles out at his neck. The guard elbowed Bond and they both fell to the ground. The ski pole fell out of Bond’s hand and he punched the guard and knocked him out.
Up ahead, Garcia and one of his guards were skiing down the hill until a huge rock was in their way. The rock opened up and Garcia and the guard skied into the hidden passage as the rock closed behind them.
Bond now had only one ski pole and he took his gun out of its holster. He sped down the mountain and he caught up with another guard. Bond fired his handgun at him but the skier evaded every shot. The guard fired back at Bond but had no success. Finally, Bond shot two shots back at him and one of them caught the guard’s leg and he stumbled straight into a jagged rock. After that Bond started wondering where Garcia went, but he had to keep skiing.
Without Bond knowing, he skied right by an important sign. On the sign it said in French, “Danger! Zone d'avalanche” translated in English, “Danger! Avalanche Zone.”
Bond heard a noise in the distance. It was a chopping noise which Bond easily identified as a helicopter. The helicopter flew in front of Bond and the side door opened. A man with a machine gun appeared in the door. He fired a round at Bond but with no luck. The man had a look of disgust on his face and he uttered something that Bond could not hear. Two other men with bungee cords attached to their backs jumped off the chopper. They landed on the ground behind Bond, about 100 meters away from him. They both fired a round of ammunition at Bond with no success, and they threw down their guns. One of the skiers caught up to Bond while the other was just seconds behind. Bond elbowed the closer foe and knocked him down.
The man who originally fired the machine gun at Bond from the helicopter took out something that caught his attention more, a rocket launcher. He loaded it and was ready to launch it.
Bond and the other skier tangled up and Bond smacked him with his ski pole and the henchman fell down, but Bond dropped his PPK in the making.
Bond had now realized that Garcia, somehow, had gotten away. He looked up and saw the shooter from the helicopter launch the rocket. Bond heard the loud screeching noise go right over his head, a complete miss. Then, a loud rumbling noise could be heard in the distance. Bond turned around to see a huge pile of snow engulf the enemy that he had knocked down. It looked as if the mountain was falling over. Bond sped up and all he could hope to do was to outrun the avalanche. Up ahead of him the helicopter was lowering itself to about three feet off the ground. The same gunner from before had reloaded the machine gun, and he started firing at Bond. Bond, now weaponless, looked around for someway to evade the chopper. To his right, just in front of the helicopter, was a giant rock covered in ice. The rock was slanted up on one side and it went straight down on the other. The slanted side was the one facing Bond. Bond skied over to it, took a good angle so that he was facing the chopper and he skied up onto the rock. He flew into the air, just above the helicopter, and he stuck his last remaining ski pole into the choppers of the helicopter. The chopper fell and it smashed into the ground, shaking up the pilot and the shooter. The shooter saw the huge pile of ice coming towards him and he ran out of the helicopter towards the downhill side of the mountain. It was way too late for him and the avalanche covered the helicopter and the fleeing soldier.
Bond now had only one more obstacle, the avalanche. He sped up even more and was skiing down the mountain at an incredible speed. He kept trying to get faster but the snow kept getting closer and closer. He looked around and watched the avalanche hurl forward down the hill and approach him. Bond lifted up his sleeve and there his brand new watch that Q had given him was on his wrist. Bond pressed a button on the top right of the watch. For about 7 seconds or so the only thing that could be heard was the avalanche towering down the mountain, only 50 meters behind him. Then, another helicopter, this one with a British flag on it, flew over his head. A rope dropped down from it right in front of Bond, and he grabbed onto it. The chopper pulled Bond away just as the piles of snow passed right under his feet. He flew away very unsatisfied and very confused about the Garcia situation, he knew his next move was to go to Tijuana and find Garcia

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So, did anyone read it?