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From Kills To Kisses

From Kills To Kisses

BM Message Board Member Perminisconious contributes detailed statistics of James Bond's violence and love affairs
News Category: General Movie News
Posted on April 13, 2005 11:05 AM
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First the sneak peak pictures of GoldenEye Rogue Agent at the E3 Festival using his stealthy camera phone, then his Four Degrees Of The James Bond Movies challenge (which, last I checked, still holds), and now this.

This time around, Perm's great contribution to the James Bond community can be seen as a statistical ultimatum for the Bond movies. If you want stats, you've got 'em. From kills to kisses, Perm's report sheds some light on the scope of James Bond's habits on the silver screen.

For the curious, Perm set the following rules for his detailed, movie-by-movie statistics to accompany the Excel file:

For someone to be counted as killed, it had to be a circumstance where the person was not likely to survive. So, if someone was punched in the face and fell limp to the ground, I chalked that up to unconciousness, but if someone was in an explosion, they're dead for all I care. Some firefights were hard to keep count, but I tried to get as many henchmen as I could.

A woman is chalked up to being 'implicitly' bedded by Bond if there is a line or a scene leading into when they were going to bed, but we don't see an 'after' shot (for all we know, Bond could've had trouble 'keeping the British end up' or something).

If there was an 'after' shot or a 'during' shot, I counted that as him 'explicitly' sleeping with her.

Marking Bond as 'believed dead' basically came when a villain attempted to kill Bond, was unsuccessful, but treated it as he was dead, since he had no proof that he did survive.

Honorable mentions were just my little way of adding in any silly additions of things taken out by Bond that weren't humans.

The following is summarized version of Perm's contribution.

For the more detailed, movie-by-movie version, download the Microsoft Excel file here.

TOTALS
Total kills by Bond: 195
Total women kissed by Bond: 54
Total Implicit Bond beddings: 23
Total Explicit Bond beddings: 23
Times Bond believed dead: 12

MOST IN A MOVIE
Deadliest movie (most kills by Bond): Goldeneye (26 kills)
Most kissable movie (most women kissed by Bond): Dr. No, Goldfinger, You Only Live Twice, A View To A Kill (4 women each)
Most implicit beddings in a movie: From Russia With Love, A View To A Kill (3 women each)
Most explicit beddings in a movie: Thunderball, Live And Let Die (3 women each)
Horniest movie (most total beddings): From Russia With Love, A View To A Kill (4 women each)
Most misinformed movie (most times believed dead): A View To A Kill (3 times)

LEAST IN A MOVIE
Least deadly movie (least kills): The Man With The Golden Gun (only Scaramanga)
Least kissable movie (you can see where these are going): Diamonds Are Forever, The Living Daylights (Plenty O'Toole and Kara only)
Least implicit beddings: Thunderball, Live And Let Die, The Spy Who Loved Me, Octopussy, Die Another Day (goose egg for each)
Least explicit beddings: You Only Live Twice, Diamonds Are Forever, The Man With The Golden Gun, The Living Daylights, Licence To Kill (again, the goose egg)
Least horny movie: Diamonds Are Forever (just implied with Tiffany Case)

THE BONDS
Deadliest Bond: Brosnan (76 kills, average of 19/movie)
Least deadly Bond: Lazenby (6 kills) or Dalton (5.5 kills/movie)
Most implicit beddings: Connery (9 women) or Lazenby/Dalton (2/movie)
Least implicit beddings: Lazenby (2 women) or Moore (1/movie)
Most explicit beddings: Moore (11 women, average of 1.57/movie)
Least explicit beddings: Dalton (big fat zero)
Horniest Bond: Moore (18, average 2.57/movie)
Least horny Bond: Dalton (4, average 2/movie)
Bond most believed dead: Moore (5 times) or Brosnan (.75/movie)

Expect the movie profiles here at BM to incorporate these statistics soon. :)


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